19 Mar Chasing Gidget: Resistance
55 minutes and the yoga class starts.
That means, in 20 minutes I should be leaving for the gym.
Which means I should definitely not be sitting in my pajamas on my laptop. For sure not that.
I hate the phrase, “What you resist persists.” It feels like the ultimate New Age woo woo bullshit soundbite that makes coaches seem less than credible. Every industry has its cliches. I wonder if other industry vets roll their eyes when they catch themselves mid-catchphrase like I cringe when I notice myself making coach noises or framing everything as a challenge or opportunity. (Framing, great concept but more lingo. Ew.)
Wow, that’s a lot of pre-yoga anger, Gidget. And a lot of resistance. I wonder what that’s about. Why don’t you take a breath, notice what’s happening, and let it go.
Yoga. The class this morning is called “Mindful Movement.” I’d have found a hundred reasons to skip it, but the description and my commitment to myself won. Deeply restorative for tight minds and tight bodies. Yes, more of that please.
Class is in 40 minutes. I can’t wait any longer. If I’m doing this, I’m doing this. I just wrote about doing what you have to do, but I didn’t write about why it’s sometimes challenging to do what you have to do. I didn’t write about how nervous I get when I’m trying new things, how often I want to fit in even though I wish I didn’t care, how I would love to give myself more room to play and make mistakes and learn even when I’ve never done the thing before which is exactly what I teach other people to do, and how worried I get that I’ll get worse, not better and injure myself more when all I want is to feel good after a long time of not feeling very well at all.
Colin said swimming and yoga. The doctor said get into a routine. I’m going. I’m definitely going. Wait, do I still have a yoga mat? Where is that headband? Get it together, Gidget. You can do it. Now get your water and go.
Why am I doing this?
To get better. But better at what exactly? Surfing. Surfing and swimming and having shoulders that don’t clunk and grind and fall out on a whim. Better at loving myself. Better at being who I want to be. Better at being who I am. Better at simply being without attachments or expectations. Better at being gentle and forgiving of and with myself. Better at being present and open and filled with grace. Better at being connected and integrated and whole. Better at being a better being.
Earlier this week, I shared this awesome archival Seth Godin post talking about why we resist with a client. What happens when we’ve reached the edge of our comfort zones and are pushing to grow more? A part of our brain, a very real, very important part of what makes us go also inconveniently encourages us to stop, to stay safe, not take risks and at all costs DON’T CHANGE. Godin goes on to say that if we want to keep getting closer to what we truly want, we must find ways to quiet and ignore that part of our brain. When I’m coaching clients on resistance, we’re looking to discover what’s useful about it, take that part and leave the rest.
Catchphrase aside, if you’re holding onto something tightly, aka resisting, whether it’s a story about how things are supposed to be, a core belief that has served you really well in the past but may be outdated, a bad habit like checking your likes on Facebook and Instagram for the posts you shared earlier instead of using that time to get ready and go to the gym so you can get another step closer to that goal you set, the thing you are holding onto will continue to define your present conditions and you will not achieve the change you are seeking. It persists.
I went to the yoga class, nervous as a kid entering a new school. I walked in behind a gentleman in his 80s walking with a cane. I figured if he could do it, I could do it.
And we did, and I feel better for doing it, and now I can confidently add this into my training and rehabilitation plan which is actually working quite nicely.
Progress over perfection, people. Do what it takes, leave the rest, and feel good.
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